Eagles win, but Dolphins put McNabb back in a familiar spot

by D.C. Fisher

The Eagles victory over the stuck-in-a-tuna-net Miami Dolphins this weekend was uglier than A.J. Feeley’s neckbeard. If not for the Villanova-powered strength of Brian Westbrook, da Birds could’ve easily lost that game. And beyond the shame of losing to a grown man named “Cam Cameron,” we would’ve provided the Fins with their first victory of the season. But beyond all of this, there is, essentially, only one question going through the minds of Eagles fans right now. No, it’s not a question of who finally paid the ransom to let L.J. Smith out of hiding, but a question of what to do about Donovan McNabb.

McNabb was hurt for the fourth time in the last six seasons the week prior to Thanksgiving in the second quarter of Sunday’s game. Perhaps he just likes to go out and celebrate Icelandic Language Day (November 16) more than the rest of us. Who knows? Unlike those other times, however, most Eagles fans were probably breathing a sigh of relief that Donovan had to leave, as he was a pathetic 3/11 for 34 yards, two Schuylkill Expressway-ugly interceptions, and a final passer rating of 0.4, which is approximately the BAC you’d need to have to actually enjoy an Eagles game lately. Feeley came in to screw the Dolphins again and help lead Philly to a win. And when I say, “lead Philly to a win,” I mean, “not drop the ball when he hands it off to Brain Westbrook.” All the while, heralded rookie Kevin Kolb looked on from the sidelines, and contemplated whether he’d fall under the terrible Houston Cougars Quarterbacks Curse that got both David Klinger and Andre Ware.

The blame can hardly fall entirely on McNabb though. He showed that his legs are beginning to become an asset again with two nice scrambles for 28 yards, and had a strong pocket presence. The biggest problem we are being faced with is the fact that the Eagles receiving corps are open less frequently than the vegetable crisper in Reid’s refrigerator. Reggie Brown is proving himself to be a slightly taller, more expensive Todd Pinkston, Jason Avant is actually less productive than Freddie Mitchell, and for some reason, the short, white, slow Kevin Curtis still hasn’t scored a touchdown since week 6. Good thing we gave him $8 million per year, and not someone who can stretch the field, like, oh, I don’t know, Donte’ Stallworth (who also wins an award in the “Most Confusing and Unnecessary Apostrophe in a Name” category). McNabb was getting some great pass protection all day from the Eagles fantastic O-line, but couldn’t find anyone open and tried to force the ball where he didn’t have a play.

There were positives, however, such as Westbrook’s aforementioned career day, the great offensive line work the Eagles’ front five has been doing, and some fine play by the defense to keep the Dolphins’ offense off the board, using a tactic called “just stand there while Miami shoots itself in the foot.” Or flipper, or fluke, or whatever f-word you want to use to describe the Miami offense. Yes, even that one. In fact, the only touchdown Philly gave up was on the 87-yard run-back by Ginn, who showed that he can return kicks without destroying his leg during the celebration, Bill Gramatica-style.

The Eagles have a lot of work ahead of them, as they will almost assuredly be curb-stomped by the shamelessly evil New England Patriots and coach Darth Hobo. But after that, the Birds have winnable games against Seattle, New Orleans and Buffalo. And if they can surprise either the Giants in Philly or the ‘Boys in Dallas, they might just reach the magic 9-7 and have a shot at the playoffs.